| I got pregnant a year ago at the age of 32. I wasn’t ready for that. When I gave the news to my husband, he told me he also wasn’t ready but he was ok to keep the pregnancy. It was mostly me that made the decision of terminating my pregnancy. The day before my appointment, I had a really bad feeling. I got sick to the extent that I went to the emergency. Also, believe it or not I had a dream where I was told: “aren’t you afraid of the consequences?” From the moment I found out about my pregnancy, I saw the world differently. Everything was beautiful. I felt strong inside and the bonding had already happened in me. I felt full of energy and very motivated. I could sleep very well and food was delicious. After abortion things changed. It was a year ago and since then I feel like I’m dead inside. I can’t sleep well. I was a highly motivated person with a lot of passion for life and learning. But all those energy is blocked in me. They’re not gone, I can feel them inside me but I can’t apply them to my life. I was kind, caring, and confident. But those sides of me are blocked in me. To me it’s like my self is fragmented. My emotions, my personality traits, etc. they’re all fragmented in a strange way I had never experienced before. I think about a suicide now. I get worse everyday. If I hadn’t done an abortion, I would have been a happy person with a little baby now. If you read this message, please never choose to abort a pregnancy. Little study has been done on the mental effects of abortion. It is devastating.. |
