I would like to introduce myself, my name is Liz and I was in an abusive relationship in 2021-2022 and my only way out was in his words “death or if you ever cheated on me”. I wanted out and I didn’t wanna die knowing he would be the last person I was seen with. I cheated on him in December of 2021 and found out I was pregnant with the other man’s child on February 18th 2022.
I was 19 and afraid to be a mother with no support so I told my mom and she told me she would never turn her back on me and supported my decision to have an abortion. My father would’ve made me marry the guy and never would’ve spoken to me again so I never told him and he passed away in 2023 so he never found out and none of his side of the family ever did. They would’ve turned away from me when all I needed was support.
I scheduled my abortion on the 15th of March and I was terrified. My mom drove me and told me she would never think ill of me and she had my back. I went through with it and I have felt guilty even after almost 3 years post abortion. I am married to the most amazing man and he is aware of my past, we are actively trying for a child because I am now 22 and ready for a child but I can’t help but feel I wasted my shot at being a mother and that I am not worthy. I feel like I can’t get pregnant because I got an abortion, but I know it’s probably a lot deeper than that and it’s on gods time. I am still taking baby steps in my journey and I am healing myself everyday.
